My Morning Do . . . “Losses”

~~ by tkbrown
19 September 2020
Midst all the grieving and lamenting
with such intensity the heart doth ache.
Whom can I trust? The pain, the not feeling
is more than this old, feeble soul can take.
One disaster hits, and then another.
Before I can stand up straight, I smother
the screams of anguish inside, and I hide
the pain because my neighbor cannot find
half of her belongings. How can I scream?
I need to be strong and help mend the seam
the storm ripped open before something else
renders it irreparable. Immense
are the threats to my survival, but I
am not important right now, and I sigh--
deeply, longingly--and look to the sky.

There is death and dying all around me.
Ash and charred wood, far as the eye can see
and I wonder, how will it ever be
the same; and I just want to run, to flee
and forget the loss stretching, engulfing
all. No home, no  business, no feeling
to express the emptiness entrenching
the dried riverbed; ash coating, drifiting
between the stones--gray, forlorn, seemingly
afraid to hope for better day. Achingly
eyeing the chard remains, desperately
recalling beauty--incongruently.
This is not a scene one would ever want
to revisit. Even new growth could not
erase the scars, the memories so scant.

As I contemplated the losses our country
and my fellow-citizens have experienced this week--
from fires and storms,
I grieved with them--for them;
and I penned these words
as an expression of my condolences.

To those not suffering loss at this time,
if you are ever in the path of such powerful forces,
evacuate!

Leave hearth and home!
No material belongings are worth your lives!
This cannot be stressed too much. 

The country, the world is already reeling
from unfathomable loss,
and the grieving process has begun.

The five stages of grief:
Denial,
Anger,
Bargaining,
Depression,
and Acceptance
have begun.

No two persons experience them in the same order
or to the same depth.
Oftentimes more than one can be seen at the same time.

Therefore,
no two countries will experience them the same.

Denial is not yet past--for us--
here in America!
The Anger has begun,
mostly in the form of rioting,
looting,
violence,
and mayhem
focusing on other areas
rather than the death and dying
all around us
directly related to coronavirus--

in our families
and in society.

So, the Denial has not passed.
It is still going on
along with the Anger,
and some Bargaining.

Expressions of Anger are being blamed
on events not truly related
to society's loss from the pandemic.

It is hard to separate personal loss
from societal loss.

Is that even possible?
I don't think so. 

Be strong enough to feel--more than the anger!
Be strong enough to heal--more, more than yourself!
It will take introspection refueled
to collectively grieve and to rebuild.

~~~~~~~~~~

Photo Above: by Dylan Nolte @Unsplash.com.

~~~~~~~~~~

Source: Kubler-Ross, M.D. and D Kessler. (August 2014). “On grief & grieving: Finding the meaning of grief through the five stages of loss.” Scribner. New York. (16 September 2020).

~~~~~~~~~~

COVID-19

~~ by tkbrown
Dropping . . . dropping . . . dropping --
economic indicators keep dropping --
GDP drops 9% -- then 35%,
the DOW plummets,
one-day losses greater than ever recorded,
one-third of their value -- lost
to COVID-19.
Unemployment skyrockets,
layoffs and furloughs,
rising . . . rising . . . rising . . .
midst businesses thriving--
just weeks ago.
The businesses did not fail,
the plague is killing them
one . . . by . . . one
as the number of COVID-19 cases keep climbing
and the death toll keeps rising,
as people finally begin to realize
this is not going away
anytime soon.
Death, illness and dying
testing our faith, strength, resolve,
taking much from the picture society had made,
reversing life -- in many ways -- to days of yore . . .
but, in many ways, advancing it to another level.
Living . . . and working . . . from home
over the 'net --
a concept never considered before
by most.
Now,
learning how to be lonely alone
becomes the painful new saga.
I learned this long ago,
I would rather be lonely alone
than to be lonely with someone.
At least, being lonely alone --
I know I am alone in this endeavor.
When I have a spouse/partner,
but am still lonely --
something is missing,
and it is harder to do
a-n-y  t-h-i-n-g.
Loneliness,
or alone time --
you can choose
to have the latter
and fill it with hobbies
that you love doing . . .
or love learning to do.
Loneliness does not have to exist,
just because
you are alone.

Get to know Y_O_U!
I know,
that is a really strange thing to say,
but all too often
we stay so busy doing
THINGS that need to be done -- 'til
we have no time to know ourselves.
We all change as time passes
whether we want to -- or not.
These changes may not be to our liking
when we really take the time to know ourselves.
It is not an easy task --
getting to know yourself --
but . . . it IS a necessary task.
So, spend some time alone
. . . with you . . ..
You might just learn to like your own company!
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