My Morning Do . . . “Loss and Grieving”

~~ by tkbrown

18 September 2020 — The loss being felt by every person in America is unmistakable, but indescribable. The amount of economic security that existed, for the most part, prior to the onset of coronavirus was more than ever known. A mental review of our nation’s good times–and bad– show an economy never so fully engaged with the world. Now, the trust linking countries and economies has been severed in many cases. Some–stronger–are weathering the storm, but so much worse for the wear. This loss is not limited to that of individuals within the country. This loss is of the country. Our nation is hurting right along with every citizen, resident, and alien. We are not alone in this loss. Every nation in the world is reeling with us.

The sheer number of deaths in the six months since the pandemic struck American soil are unprecedented. For many, there has been no time to truly grieve for want of trying to survive. Those in the health professions have been too busy trying to save lives to properly grieve losses in their private lives. The illness is so insurmountable, neither individuals suffering from the virus nor those caring for them have been spared the trauma of long-term suffering. Post traumatic stress disorder is a given for many of the survivors and for their caregivers.

Here in America, a “lockdown” perse could not be implemented. Such is the cost of freedom. Most other countries do not enjoy “freedom” to the extent Americans do. Our constitution engenders the right to refuse such imprisonment, and our citizens did just that. The consequence of that refusal has been the insurmountable death toll we are seeing because that refusal brought with it a spread of the virus not seen in other countries where true lockdowns could be enforced. Our government has told its citizens, “you are free to choose; so, you have the responsibility to choose wisely or suffer the undesirable consequences that accompany poor decision making”. The whole country has this freedom, and much of the country did not choose wisely.

The losses associated with preventive efforts, such as self-quarantine, has been the closing of many thriving businesses. Even with efforts to minimize the impact, the individual lives scarred by sacrificing all will never be the same. Jobs, businesses, schooling, production, productivity as a whole has been limited to such a degree it may take years to overcome the setback.

No one saw it coming. No one had a plan because there was no guidebook. Nothing outlined before even came close to including all losses being experienced today. It is a “one step at a time” endeavor. We have made mistakes, but much has been done right too. For every choice, there is a consequence. When we do not know what the consequence will be for a particular action, we make regrettable mistakes. However, we do not have the time to moan and groan over those mistakes, and we do not have time to point fingers regarding mistakes. No one is immune; everyone has made mistakes.

The blame game wastes precious time. It is a form of denial regarding the true severity of the situation. Our citizenry must stop the infighting and admit the feelings associated with the losses without hurting self or others. The anger being expressed in the violence and rioting must stop. It is hurting innocent people, and it is hurting those inflicting the harm.

These societal losses are experiencing the same stages of grieving seen in individual loss, but on a much larger scale. The anger is a symptom of being ready to address the underlying feelings. So, it is time to begin communicating those underlying feelings. To do this, it is necessary to understand the stages associated with grief. Our society, as we knew it, has died–worldwide–and it is left to us to pick up the pieces, one at a time.

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Photo Above: by Dylan Nolte @Unsplash.com.

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Source: Kubler-Ross, M.D. and D Kessler. (August 2014). “On grief & grieving: Finding the meaning of grief through the five stages of loss.” Scribner. New York. (16 September 2020).

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SUNSHINE BLOGGER AWARD

Special Thanks

Thank You so very much, darellphilip, for nominating me for this award. I appreciate your support of my blog posts. It means much to work in a mutually supportive environment with like minds. I believe that is what this award is about. By supporting each other we create a light that shines on those involved in this mutually supportive effort. The resulting “Sunshine” warms our hearts and soothes the soul. It is a blessing from God. Again, Thank You, darellphilip !

To those reading, if you have not visited his blog, you should go to https://darellphilip.wordpress.com/ and see what he has posted. He supports the work of others and consistently searches for more to include in this circle of ‘Sunshine.’ Check it out!

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Sunshine Blogger Award Rules:

  1. Thank the person who nominated you and provide a link back to their blog.
  2. Answer the 11 questions asked by the person who nominated you.
  3. Nominate 11 people and ask them 11 new questions.
  4. Notify the nominees by commenting on one of their posts.
  5. List the rules and display the Sunshine Blogger Award in your post.

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darellphilip’s Questions:

  1. What are you thankful for right now and why?
    • I am thankful for God’s love — the strength, clarity, love for others He instills in me; for my family — my children, grandchildren, siblings, nieces, nephews, and cousins; for each person with whom I come into contact — face-to-face, in social media, and on this and other blog posts, I am truly blessed by each; for my ability to express myself in written form — both prose and poetry, for this blog page — it has helped me to expand my horizons with regard to who I am and the purposes for my writing ability, and I am thankful for the necessities of life which are provided in abundance.
  2. Who inspires you?
    • my fellow bloggers, other authors, other poets, journalists, academics, family, friends, the news. I often am inspired to pursue a new line of research or thought by the written or verbal expression of others.
  3. Where is your favourite vacation spot?
    • It varies, but typically the Ozarks in the heartland of the United States. It is where I grew up and I am enthralled with the lay of the land. I feel very close to nature and to God when I am there.
  4. When did you first realize your love for blogging?
    • About a year ago, I realized that I truly had the ability to write poetry and prose worthy of sharing with others here on my wordpress.com pages rather than saving all of it for future publication. It has actually helped me with my projects planned for traditional publication too.
  5. Why does Black Lives Matter?
    • For me, saying specifically–Black lives Matter–excludes all other races as negligible and unworthy of mattering. I believe one race is as important–and matters as much–as any other. I believe singling out one race is much more racist than most other racist statements because it excludes ALL other races. I believe God sees the color of our hearts, not the color of our skins, when He determines who is important and that persons of all races matter to Him. Thus, persons of all races must matter to me, not just one race; I believe my responsibility is determining what one projects from his / her heart and then promote those whose projections are aligned with those of Jesus Christ. The riots that are being presented as peaceful protests are harmful to others and to the property of others, as well as to the cause they are purported to support. Thus they are against God’s will, and–as such–I cannot condone them in any form. Peaceful Protests are never violent or demeaning to others. I appreciate you asking this question, because it allows me to say these things with purpose. They have been weighing heavily on my heart.
  6. How many pets do you have?
    • none — I have had pets in the past, right now it would cost more to properly care for a pet than I can manage.
  7. What new skills have you acquired during lockdown?
    • I have been able to take the time needed to improve on my health through nutrition research and finding new and better recipes to utilize in this endeavor. I have also been able to better visualize the end product in my poetry book(s), my novels, and my non-fiction endeavors.
  8. Where does your inspiration to blog come from?
    • It comes from many sources: from reading–the blogs of others, news articles online, journal articles, poetry, and even during sleep. Inspiration comes from all about me, from within me, and from a spiritual connection with God and His Son.
  9. Who is most important to you in your life right now and why?
    • God, my children, and my grandchildren because they are God given gifts. I will never receive a better gift than my children and my grandchildren.
  10. Why should bloggers follow your blog?
    • I try to reflect on events happening in our world as I write. I try to always write with honesty and integrity in a way which allows others to take what they like and leave the rest. I am honored to know others see enough value in my posts to want more people to see and read them too. These award nominations have humbled me much. All praise, I believe, goes to God and His Son, Jesus. I strive to live my life in a manner pleasing to them. Hopefully, the value of that will continue to be seen by others. Thank You for asking this question too. It has given me the opportunity to reflect upon what I do and why. Thank You for nominating me!
  11. When will racism end?
    • I fear–because evil roams the world seeking ways to destroy all efforts for peaceful existence–I fear it will not end until the Lord comes to call us home.

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My Nominees:

  1. Tangie @ https://www.tangietwoods.blog
  2. Blanca @ https://journeyinfindinggod414907732.wordpress.com/
  3. ChallEngEr @ https://ministryin.wordpress.com/
  4. Nomison @ https://artnomison.wordpress.com/
  5. Sarah @ https://studywys.wordpress.com/about-myself/
  6. Anju @ https://thinkbigcom529246297.wordpress.com/about/
  7. Maurice @ https://soulrenewed.wordpress.com/
  8. parneetsachdev @ https://timelessmind.org/
  9. Maxine @ https://heavensreef.wordpress.com/
  10. Terese @ https://teresebelme.com/
  11. Saania @ https://saania2806.wordpress.com/

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My Questions for My Nominees:

  1. What is your favorite color and why?
  2. Who is your favorite author and why?
  3. If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go and why?
  4. What is your favorite quote? Why?
  5. In your education, what has had the most impact on you? Why?
  6. What is your favorite course of study? Why?
  7. Who influenced you to begin your blog? Why?
  8. Do you implement your own writing style on your blog, or do you follow that of someone else? Why?
  9. If you could correct one aspect of the world right now, what would it be and why?
  10. Who do you look up to and why?
  11. What, or who, is your greatest source of strength? Why?

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Again, Thank You, darellphilp, for nominating me for this award! To those whom I nominated, I look forward to reading your responses. Please remember to link back to my site when you complete your post. Thank You!